How to Make a Living as a Writer

Horse stories in the morning, erotica in the afternoon

When people ask what I do for a living, I’m faced with two choices: either I can lie or I can bore them with the truth, which is too complicated to explain succinctly. While those around me have normal, definable jobs—accountant, journalist, engineer—my work requires headings and subheadings to get it across properly: a map of overlapping gigs and contracts.

“What do you do?” It’s a simple question that often gets asked on first dates. No matter how much I pare down my reply, it’s always long winded.

“Well, I’m a freelancer,” I start, “so I have a million little jobs . . .”

The first of my million little jobs is what I call “Horse News.” It works like this: every weekday, I wake up at 6 a.m. and make my way to my desk, stumbling and still half asleep. I flick on an old lamp and wince as my eyes adjust to the light. I turn on my computer and use a piece of software that shows me all of the American horse racing–related news from the past twenty-four hours. It pulls up radio clips, Fox News segments, and articles from publications called BloodHorse or Daily Racing Form—anything that could be relevant to my interests.

I sift through countless story summaries, many of which sound fake. Army Wife defeats Crazy Beautiful Woman in race! Another doping scandal emerges in Northern California! A disgraced-but-very-good trainer is no longer banned from the track! A famous YouTuber has invested millions into a betting app! I compile the important stuff into a newsletter: stories about track renovations, big events, the series of horse laws that were passed, then repealed, then approved again in 2023.

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